4-30-2016 I've spent this last April evening crying my eyes out Being strong for years on end wears on one's being I feel weak, I feel alone, in the darkness... Actual and rhetorical, distractions hold sway no longer Thoughts, feelings...boiling over the edge Why put on a happy face?!? I've done it for so long … Continue reading #279 →

Self Talk You knew, you knew from the start! Lying to yourself only deludes your understanding  That's what hope does, you overly hopeful bastard Few are prepared and none are more Rare oils rest alone You, one of the rarest Alone.

Pbutt and Sniperooney "Down guys, down... Roll over!"  "Good girl! Good boy!" Scratch the heads, the jaws, take the paws  Grab the food, take two bowls, healthy scoops to brim filled goodness Tails wagging, water full, take a pull, time to eat! "Good doggies!"

Redux Thank you You were the inspiration for thought Carried over time and emptiness  Nothing more A placeholder of think Thank you

Stone  Memories walking  Loving loves, unrequited  Numbness seeps to core

Worth Is More Stop sacrificing self for women who don't care about, don't see, don't value  Too wrapped in a world of face deep wisdom and cheap fanciful fucks Worth so very much more, more than worthy, though  None see nor value the gift...the folly of an intention deficient society  Worthy of love, true love...the … Continue reading #274 →

Soluble  Immediacy's gratifying armor shed for acceptance of is What one wants is of trivial import Energy without, comparable to that within  Spectrum the same, though focus, the change 

Coastal  Planning escape Lastly broken straw man excuse removed Spread to area more accepting More inviting to intellectual being Cesspool of intelligence dearth Is blistering wizened soul

Buddy System Withdraw Lock away Tuck inside Hide beneath Remove from view Forget  Move along

Naïve In Fame Making time is done, privilege lost when no reciprocal thought given Stepped over support, for granted taken...walk on toes of love Discarded for society's fancy, that bullshit show Seen with excitement and lustful fervor... Novelty never had, dipping toes into pool of acid, about to take a plunge "Stop! Wait!" -SPLASH...glug glug-

Running No interest, fickle flame...hidden beauty seen by one with vision  Brought to fore and used for empty connections Mistaken interests, used for lusts, sadly sweet... Beauty played raw. "Buddy" forgotten, shelved in disrepair  Too much life, too much reality...too real for popularity's fancy

To Trudge Emotional infancy, cherished for ignorance sake Seen sadly squandered , sequestered for faux love's arrival Carry on, to the stars through difficulty  Attempting to fill a cavity as hollow as the sky Yearns for something never had, but tasted for a moment  A moment, that moment, two lifetimes ago A ghost of nothing, … Continue reading #268 →

Fuck! Overwhelmed with emotion, condensed to physical form Crying alive with love for the unconscious Discarded for society's play song Lost in lusts of every man Realize without is far from within Carrying on for so long  So very long wrapped in a love destitute Hopelessly, romantically lost in refined silence  Overlooked, streamlined to relevance … Continue reading #267 →

Wolf's Time In that moment, the dead of night, that is where the real pain resides Hidden from view by distraction and attention sway Hand curdled and broken from ambulatory neglect  The pain, a sharpened, numbing ache...a tattoo constant.  Chore to sleep, thoughts and pain...bonsoir et c'est la vie.

Moriah  She whispers in that quiet moment "You feel real and it scares me to death" He travels across time of thought Wondering what made this woman  What makes her chaotic beauty resonate What makes her speak to his soul  The voice of an angel sounds through song Carried over time and eons He sees … Continue reading #265 →

Birth of Life Spring evening hints of summer sauna Amazing beauty in blooming growth! Newborn flowers, grass, budding trees Energy magnificent and awe inspiring !

Conscious facepalm  Hope offered is pricelessly cast aside Costly mistake, empathy is nonexistent  Outside experience is ever prevalent  The only thing considered  The ignorantly conscious, playing kid games Thought aware. 

Construction Zone  Hard hat area, watch for falling debris Freedom walls built up around  Time for rebar reinforcement Less likely to fall Few to none are more Lesson learned from experience  Good enough for all but love's arrival.

L'avenir Coast to coast is calling Boat goes over pond Southern beaches and  Winery fringes

Dashed A keen understanding,  An effervescent love. Space and space returned,  Glances only shared  Hugs and jugs are emptied  Of meaning and water alike

The View of Silence Heart fades back to stone Twenty years too long Too long for the expendable land of Strawberry Winters. Reason and logic subsumed in fettered form Cries out for embryonic flame Shot to the heart Waning vitality seeps to DMT revelation  Multitudes without Consciousness seen as cancer An egocentric landscape.  What does … Continue reading #259 →

Torment to Light Being near people only enforces what shows lacking An understanding, a respect, a yearning, a love Too scarred, too emotional, too real, too much life  To be less would be a lie but acceptable to the world without  Truth in, truth out. I know the truth. I'll walk this road alone.  Life, … Continue reading #258 →

Illusory Seeing reality unwind, awareness of the illusion brings peace The disillusioned bring war, bring hunger, bring shame of life

Songbird  Birds singing, calling morning forth Light creeping over horizons edge,  Majestic radiance abounds Calmly watcher listens to the sounds Sleep escapes, walking on the ledge Of conscious thought. What is beauty worth?

Sowing Memories shattered, chances passed over May shining approaches as April warms the seed Casting hither, while tither grows wild Neglected beauty grown beyond the bound of thought  

Spacecraft  Seeing the same story unfold in another life... Narratives change but message remains What comes of a naive, frightened boy, who is thrust to manhood  And expected to know all he should have learned, sans thrust? Solitary confinement transforms extrovert to introvert Coupled with experience dearth, drives one mad with experience lust Lustful folly … Continue reading #254 →

Endeavor  Here I am, alone Screaming infidelities And yet, I still try

Without Evil Wanton judgments from vapid accusers Raison d’être reinforced Striving for panacea Poisons run rampant Get in, get out! Rid the world of hungry filth Utopia is a dream The accusers’ escape A hell without evil

American Dream  Dreams spoken, dreams reborn November approaches, bringing cold Wheels turning through lives A flower tries to find meaning in sand Sand retreats with noonday tide Grasping futility, whispering winds the flower catches wind of bloom Bright and shining, it stands alone

Ad Astra Per Aspera  Emotional distance to white, black, red, yellow  Hardened living makes him an accepting, loving, quite jaded fellow Pouring forth live in droves  Walls erected and on he moves Try and try to not be hole of ass Why?!? Naught but dismembered heartache comes to pass Judgement and accusation pouring forth in … Continue reading #250 →

Troy Petty Stop running from life Be known and tread not lightly Start running to life

Nighttime  Whiskey midnight burns Bourbon is best to cure ails Nightcap, off to bed.

Ode To The Brain Injured Injured in brain, saved by whatever above Or below, tossed upon the scrap heap of love In life thought less,  Relevance reduced to nothingness Voice cries out, one of uncounted hence Ignored no longer, they've only gotten louder since One anoints himself the bard Language art and word originization thought … Continue reading #247 →

Artistic Curse Poets walk alone But for those they carry with Solitary jail

Chemical Love Half life beckons truth Dead before feelings are seen Survival lies bare

Purpose  Life moves without quest To be found with truth of self Many never find 

We Don't Need Roads Finding myself in darker places Places of memories past; of a future misplaced and never had Tear and tear begats a river thence of an ardent, yet forlorn hope Walking love down the lane of never haves Voice crying out, strident passion plays from this alien source the Familiar tone and … Continue reading #243 →

Lying awake, needing to be up in less than four hours. My mind is in a very weird, almost familiar place right now. Like I've been here before, though on a much baser level. Going over my writings the last three weeks, I can see an underlying theme. I am restless in life; with the … Continue reading April shower →

Time Stop Time moves without stop Man made creation gone wrong Used to forget life

Intellect Sitting quietly Contemplating thoughts untold Mind running wild

Reality  In darkened places Where light can barely get through He wanders alone 

Lingering  Nothing will happen  As nothing has happened since  A fool's hope, wasted

Love For Granted Taken Personal love is not possible, for lack of understanding and expectations of is Love overflowing, pouring forth in every action  Lends credence to viability as one mature in love Intimidating presence, intimidating experience, misunderstood by all without By all with a naive love, a brief underestimation of truth in awareness 

Death of Hope Begging for a chance, begging for abandoned cowardice Society's view of life is sad, its view of right is wrong On many levels, lost in ego fit. Beg no more! Done with all of it, box it away, choke it down with the rest Breathe deep, the familiar ache resides in resonance  … Continue reading #237 →

Truth Telling  Farsical fancies, dreams alone Shared and shown in living essence Seeing is believing is being is dreaming, alive Unfettered, nascent existence

Ghosting Teasing The edge of thought, that grey area of mischief. What happens to the thought focused on the edge though not secure of self? Slipping in, slipping out, realty unrendered... Brought to fore with wild eyed and manic stutter. Slips away with illusion's prevalence.