#377

Blessed Injury

Time has come and truth is seen 

Fucked and whored since but a tween

Man wants no part as he’s seen shit

Of different sort and wants none of it

Painful hell, elapsed benefit in disguise 

Best of best seen lesser in counter eyes

Bullshit system, manipulation run amuck 

For the longest time, lamented being stuck

Or so it seemed, married not nor never hence

Forth…for known is truth, that it makes no sense

But for feminine gain, “independent” ones

To live off sweat of what others have done

Stretches, yawns, greats daylight arrival

Life is grandest when not fought for daily survival

Advertisements

This thing called life

Life as we know it is a ball of hormones, influenced and controlled by media influence. This is a very sad and droll look at human existence, to think we are on some sort of plateau when in reality we are holding ourselves back with small mindedness and political absurdities.  

Life is a truly beautiful thing in and of itself. Look past your own sufferings and selfish trivialities and look at the amazing character of life. That is where we get stuck, it is understandable that the survival instinct be a dominant trait but the modern human mindset is conditioned to think it needs much more than necessary for survival. 

My own experience with the shades of life has opened my eyes. Anything I put my mind to I excelled at. I was a child prodigy. I was a star athlete for my high school, I was a stellar scholar: scoring a 29 on the ACT at 15, started college at 16, et cetera et cetera, I was a phenomenal musician and self taught guitar player, a singer/songwriter… the world was my oyster.

My life was forever changed by the thirstiness of a redneck. After having just turned seventeen a month prior, I was involved in a severe car accident. I suffered a TBI, three month coma, contused spinal column, shattered left hip, shattered left elbow, broken Femur; ulna; radial bones, lacerated liver, ruptured spleen and dysphonia… needless to say, the prognosis was not good.

People ask me all the time how I overcame such strong odds. I fully realize now, though I wasn’t aware of it, that I am the one to shape my universe. I had stuff to do, life to live! Never, never, never give up. That was my motto through the months and years of physical trauma and rehabilitation.  

Sure, it may sound like some feel good seminar bull crap “think happy thoughts”. But the truth of the matter is, it seriously works. If you want to be happy, change your view. I have said this for years but didn’t fully realize what I was saying. If you’re going through life worried about this and that, your thoughts project such manifestations into being.  

I am often complimented on how happy I am and what a joy I am to see. Why? Through my experience of having lost much and yet excelled to the point I have, through it all, I have learned one chief lesson. Life is too short to be anything but happy and happiness is a choice. It is that simple. I overcame such odds because I saw where wanted to be and my thoughts, energizing the space around me, caused it to happen.

Call me crazy, call me what you will. I don’t live my life complaining about this and that, if something is wrong and you can change it, do. If it is something out of your control, don’t fret about it.

Hashtag Truth

Here I am, a romantic who has never known love, a great catch who cannot catch anything beyond fish during fishing excursions. I am naïve, awkward and too focused on the wrong things. I need to focus on myself, my future, my wealth, my health. I need to put me first, fuck this social conditioning and feeling like a selfish prick because of my accident. It was not my fault! Yes, I needed help, lots of help…I still need help at times. I apologize for none of it, I did not ask for this to happen, who would?!?

 People bitching about their lives and looking at me like i have it easy are just kicking me in the nuts over and over… It pisses me off! They see where I have brought myself back to and they think it was handed to me, like some miracle. Fuck that bullshit! God is a scam! Prayer is a delusion! I am in pain every moment of every day of my life these past 15.5 years. No one would know because I am not a self involved little bitch whining about every god damned thing in my life! You people need some perspective, seriously! I am so sick of this shit, most of you people wanting to escape and ruin your not tragically altered lives because of some trivial bullshit. It is maddening! Truly!!! I am here observing this, making the best of this severely altered, some might say ruined, chance at life and doing a phenomenal job. And I very rarely complain…I am not looking for self pity and fuck you for thinking you are better than me or others because we need help! I did not get to where I am today by myself but I made the choice not to piss and whine about how bad I have it. Shut the fuck up, grow the fuck up, make the choice to be happy, help other people, and help them without feeling owed or entitled to recompense!