Bedtime catharsis…

Turmoil is a yearly occurrence, different players, same pattern follows.  I must needs examine myself and find out what it is that draws people in yet makes them discard me near an instant later.  I just wrote a poem examining this phenomenon… multiple poems the past few days.  I am not going to wait to be blindsided again, I recognize the issue and I am/have been learning to trust my instinct.  It almost always proves accurate.  Wrote a long hand letter earlier.  I am worried, very much so.  She is changing her life to suit some PUA’s schedule, never mind the new business venture in the works… have to please the man.  “Oh, but the business will be there the next day”… as will his manipulative ass… phone calls do wonders.  But he got his prize, drunk and feeling frisky.  Alcoholic trysts are nothing to base anything on.  “But… but… but… I don’t know a god damned thing, I will pretend that I do and it will make everything okay” folly… ignorant folly.  I can only be the voice of reason for so long… fuck it, she is one of my best friends but I cannot care.

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